behind “Memento”
it was a winter night back in 2020 when I was trying to sleep and couldn't. the drama (that week) was the feeling that among the many songs I was producing, none of them had the profile to be my first single.
at the same time, the words of Nick (my friend and producer) echoed: stop writing, you're already sitting on top of a pile of good music. (a phrase he always repeats, by the way.)
12 AM and I was tossing and turning in bed, trying to sleep. if I turned to the side of the lamp, I could hear nick saying that I already had too much music. if I turned to the window, I thought I still didn't have that first single.
beware when I say that single, I don't mean Olivia's “driver's license”, something giant and epically produced, with a Hollywood clip, but a track that in terms of composition was rich, complete, and above all, represented a moment, or a feeling, in a genuine and crystalline way. I thought a lot about “1950” by King Princess. It was during the first year of the pandemic that I discovered her music, and for me, “1950” was an example of a perfect first single. well written, produced, and very real.
I turned to one side, turned to the other, 01:00. I pick up my cell phone to consult the modern composer's #1 tool, the Voice Memos app.
scrolling and listening to some tracks, until I got to a track with about 5 minutes that had some interesting verses. in one interview, I remember hearing King Princess talking about how she ran out of the shower to write “1950” when an insight came. and the same way she must have run to the guitar, I ran to the computer. and I swear, it wasn't planned - which seems funny now that I write about it 2 years later.
at some point in the morning, sleep overcame me, but I know that the next day that raw idea on my cell phone had already turned into a demo on my desktop. and over the next two days, it was being rewritten, perfected, and I was depositing in that lyrics and music all the emotional chaos that I had felt during the first months of social isolation. the pain of old mourning that has been interrupted. the pain of the new mourning that the pandemic generated. the excitement of going out again. the feeling of doubt about when this would finally happen. a certain idealization about that day, which would only be possible from the point of view of someone who has been isolated for 3 only months… a bittersweet mess that only those who lived at that time, in that context, can understand.
after a few more days of work and I got up the courage to send the demo to Nick, who, even though he thought I already had other good tracks, immediately saw the potential for “Memento”.
from that day, until the song was released, it took over a year. so long because it wasn't just about “putting a song out”, but also deciding how to do it, in what form, and what artist I was going to be once my first single was on people's music shelves and no longer in my projects drawer.
On November 26th, 2021, “Memento” was released, and I couldn’t be happier with the outcome of all the work and production that we’ve put into it. the song grew in sound and potency, but that only made it an even more believable portrayal of the sentiment it carries in its composition.
the portrait of a moment when sadness is no longer the strongest feeling. a moment when grief seems to fade, rather than disappear. a moment when joy has not yet arrived, but seems so confirmed, that it is inevitable to idealize it at the most extreme level.
